Being in a relationship with a narcissist will feel like a nightmare you can’t seem to wake from and yet we keep fighting to save it no matter how gloomy the future may seem. You will experience all sorts of panic and anxiety during the course of this toxic relationship which will only grow more toxic over time.
As things continue to decline, your anxiety will mutate into a feeling of dread that’s looming just around the corner. This feeling is something I refer to as narcissist impending doom.
The first time I experienced this feeling of narcissist impending doom was the moment my psychopath ex started showing signs of disinterest in me in the bedroom. This was the beginning of the devaluation phase after she was convinced that I had been perfectly groomed and ready to endure torture.
I just had this gut feeling that things were changing not only by the way she was losing interest in sex but by the way her praise and compliments were declining as well. They were instead replaced with criticism, fury and rage fits. Our dates always ended up in a disagreement or a full blown fight and any precious moment we had planned ended up in chaos.
It wasn’t long until I started feeling impending doom at the mere thought of my narcissist partner. I felt 1000% better when I was with my friends, at work, or even by myself doing my own thing. However the moment I would hear that ring tone or notification on my phone, I was met with a shiver of fear and anxiety that would cascade down by spine.
This impending doom felt like terror was coming, a horrible feeling that death was waiting for me. Funny looking back now at how accurate that intuition was because death is exactly what my psychopath ex girlfriend was. She was the grim reaper, a succubus, a lich.
What’s crazy is that all psychopath narcissists have this unearthly ability to create a sense of dread over anyone they are directly involved in.
Their aura is pure darkness and hate.
They bring disaster to anyone they come in contact with. Everything they touch, breaks.
I felt this darkness early into the toxic relationship but chose to ignore it. Even during the love bombing stage I would notice small red flags and questionable vibes. As an empathetic person I was able to feel things at a deeper level that made me uneasy, but the narcissist manipulated me so well and enchanted me with her dark narcissistic spell.
This is how the narcissist is able to weaken their prey, take what they want, and leave them to rot in their misery after the discard. It’s difficult to operate and do positive things when under the toxic spell of a narcissist and a constant feeling of impending doom haunting your every thought.
But like most fears, the best way to dominate them is to face them head on. That’s right. Look fear in the eye and call it out for what it is. There is no greater fear than the one dwelling in our mind. Impending doom stems from fear of the unknown and since psychopaths are experts at diverting our attention and creating a false reality, this fear grows stronger.
If we don’t face it immediately it becomes too powerful to confront and that’s when the narcissist is at their full strength. That’s when they can destroy us.
Why would anyone want to be in a relationship with someone that creates these feelings of anxiety, fear and impending doom? It makes no sense when you put your codependent feelings down and look at this from a logical standpoint.
This narcissist monster has come to ruin your life and drain you of your energy, self esteem and self worth. Your gut intuition is screaming at you. You can feel the darkness consuming you when they are around. The sense of impending doom is amplifying by the minute. It’s time to stand up and face your fears before this psychopathic spawn of hell completely obliterates you and steals your soul.
ARE YOU A VICTIM OF A PSYCHOPATH NARCISSIST?
Narcissistic abuse is a perpetual nightmare not many can wake up from. The anxiety, trauma and PTSD can last a lifetime if one does not properly cut ties with their psychopathic tormentor and follow through with a specific plan for recovery.
However, this path can be a mystery to most victims of narcissists who’ve been discarded and dismantled. That’s why I’ve put together a step-by-step guide that will show you how to take the first step in establishing boundaries between you and your abuser. Study this guide carefully and do exactly what it says, especially if you have been recently discarded and left to rot by your narcissist ex.
These were the first instructions my mentor gave me back when I too was in hell; gasping for air from the suffocating panic and bed ridden anxiety my psychopath ex had left me in. I followed his guidance to the tee and instantly felt life breathing back into my soul… as will YOU when you follow these easy steps.
The information in this guide is crucial to your mental health and recovery. Do not hesitate or risk another minute of your life drifting into oblivion at the hands of a psychopath narcissist.
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My email isn’t working. My husband’s ex committed suicide. I’ve been discarded by him, but I am a super empath so I get back in to fight for”the relationship” My mind is blown right now.
help, 20. + years and so much damage he filed for divorce after all the abuse.
I cant seem to live without kit all of a sudden!
Dear Kira,
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for your videos! Married 15 years, in process of divorce with a child. Had no idea what a narcissist even was until found a therapist who told me in 5 mins what was dealing with. In process of watching ALL of your videos, many several times over. Especially the one about dreaming and “Why I can’t stop Thinking about the narcissist.” These are helping my recovery greatly. I think I forgave the behavior because of the sanctity of the wedding vows, and the desire for child to have 2 parents together. My question, do I need to fear him discarding our child too? His new main supply is 20 years younger than me and also has a young child. Is he going to replace our daughter too?
I was a victim of a narcissist at work. That was the worst year of my life. I’ve almost forgot about it although that happened barely 1,5 years ago. But I googled the Oscar and read what happened. I never feed “my” narcissist and she couldn’t stand me because never got anything from me. And of course I lost this job. Other happy bumper got my wonderful position. 🙂 I can’t understand how other people can endure life with a narcissist for many years. After a year I was completely knackered and had suidicidal thoughts. That was very exhausting being constantly attacked for nothing and trying to keep calm.
Thank you Kiara for your very informative videos, they have helped me A LOT! God bless you. I have been in a living hell with my narc and all these stories hit so close to home for me. I too felt like I was losing my mind and literally thought I might have died and was living in HELL. This guy was VERY good at his “game” and manipulation. The ONLY thing that truly caught me off guard and didn’t make sense was that he got my name tattooed on his chest so I believed him that he was separated from his wife and that after the “court case” they were about to endure, they were getting a divorce and he had to be nice to her or she would retaliate in court. Again, if it wasn’t for the tattoo of my name I would’ve kicked him to the curb and have known he was full of it but he got my name tattooed on his chest so I believed him. I have NEVER experienced such insane experiences as I did with this spawn of SATAN. I couldn’t understand wtf was wrong with me because I am way smarter than this and never took any BS from men. I was VERY picky when it came to who I committed to and it was always the ones that were extreme in their “proof” of how sincerely they loved me but now I realize these are red flags and not very healthy. However, my past relationships with these extreme courtships may have been slightly off but they weren’t insane. They were not as FULL BLOWN narcissist like the DEMON I was recently with. I look back now and realize maybe one of my past relationships who happened to be a doctor was a “covert” narcissist and my dad may have a slight (very slight) case of it too but this recent one was by far the most toxic, demonic, chaotic, SOUL RAPING physically, psychologically, mentally, emotionally abusive relationship I have ever experienced and is what made me dive so deep into this disorder. The hours he spent in the bathroom, the gaslighting, projecting, me walking on eggshells, the extreme highs and extreme lows. The breaking of things (including my phone that he bought me), taking my phone and going through it, knowing my social security number, all my families phone numbers, license plate numbers by heart! I mean you are right these DEMONS are smart (he had a photographic memory). I even went back to him after seeing with my own eyes his love letter text exchanges with his “supposed” ex wife, knowing he went through my phone and deleted my photos with friends and contacts, and even thinking he was going to use my credit card and having to go to the bank and close all my accounts, and thinking he was planning on getting me killed. I mean I was so addicted to this creep that I went back to him even when I was thinking he was planning on getting me killed as a decoy for his wife because that was the ONLY “logical” reason he would’ve gotten my name tattooed on him in my anxiety ridden, paranoid messed up mind. I believed all his lies and there were MANY. There truly should be a law protecting the victims and holding these POS DEMONS accountable for destroying our innocence and causing us trauma, CPTSD, paranoia and so many other destructive things these creatures cause. I’m so traumatized and never knew such evil truly existed walking around in society. I am scared of people now seeing how evil this human being was. I never knew I would ever be so close to such evil. They are a menace to society and belong locked up somewhere and that smirk, OMG that evil satanic smirk will forever haunt me. Again, thank you so much for your videos it was a God send!
You have given me hope like you cannot imagine. I was at the brink of seeing a doctor due to severe depression and anxiety.
You’ve saved me.